Sometimes the truth you seek comes from the most unlikely sources, and it is these particular truths that possess the uncanny ability to solve the problems that you thought were unsolvable. In a way it is like the old addage, the one about how the solution to a problem comes from the most unlikely source. Tonight that enlightenment came from the television, more specifically "Sex in the City". Now I usually don't watch the show, even though I find the situation comedy quite funny, but tonight I had a desire to watch it. Fortunately for me, the show made me realize some of the issues I have with my relationships with people. Now the issue isn't getting along with people. The issue I have is letting people get close to me. I think that's kinda what happens when as a child you don't have many friends. It is a fear of people leaving you, and I think that by finding reasons not to connect with people it is just my way of avoiding giving people the ability to leave me. That's the source of my insecurities about my relationship. It is my way of distancing myself from him so that I have an excuse if anything does go wrong. . My worries about our future are just preventing me from realizing how much people care about me. The moral of the story boys and girls is that you will never know true happiness in this lifetime unless you let people into your life, and into your heart.