
Excerpted from today's entry on my blog. Just posting this here for whatever reason:
On a few hours sleep, I had lunch Saturday with Anthony Rapp, in town to promote his new book and do an acoustic show at the Swedish American Music Hall. Once again, the bears made me nervous as every brunch place on my way to Nirvana was overflowing with lines onto the sidewalk, but apparently, Nirvana was too healthy for the bears, and I got my pick of tables. Anthony and I had the longest conversation of the time we have known one another, and it was certainly enlightening.
One of the things I discussed with him, since I don't know many people who can relate, is that I have never been good at accepting praise for Oasis. It's been ten years, and when people e-mail me to thank me for the site, sometimes in their late 20s now after reading it when they were teens, it is not something I let in easily. The e-mails sit in my in box, and some block prevents me from just admitting that what I created has had an effect. The strange part is that Oasis was wholly my own invention, it is not even like I'm being humble because I don't want to step on other people's toes. There are no other toes. (Although it i safe to say that without Jase Pittman-Wells playing designer/webmaster from the start, it might not have come to fruition). Anthony said it was "unacceptable" to not take credit for it.
Flash forward to yesterday (Tuesday), and I'm reading the piece the SF Chronicle wrote about Anthony and his book, which has been getting across-the-board great reviews. After reading the piece, I am actually recalling our conversation from Saturday, in particular the notion that I need to own my role in Oasis. In that very moment, the phone rings, and it is a previous contributor to Oasis, who started reading it in his teens and is now a college senior, specifically calling me to thank me for Oasis and the impact it had on his life. Now, e-mails are pretty common on this topic, but this is the first random phone call of this kind I can ever remember. So, when the universe conspires to help you, it doesn't go for subtlety apparently.
Comments
Go jeff
Go jeff, you create kick ass websites, open those damn emails, co you kick ass.
That's all that needs to be said
"Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suf-fer-ing"
:)
I haven't been in a position where I have hugely impacted so many other people's lives, and the only person I've met that has was flattered and happy and seemed to accept that her books had helped people through abuse or recovery from suicide. My guess, though, would be that everyone reacts to something that huge differently.
And you absolutely should take the credit. Everyone else has already given it to you, you just haven't accepted it yet.
I know that I would be a lot more confused and unhappy today if I didn't have this community to help me when I was questioning insanely, and I am so glad this site is here for others to work through their feelings now. And I don't give anyone but you the credit for starting it.
Are you hanging on to something useless just because you think it's beautiful?
--William Zinsser
Be proud :)
Modesty is a good thing in small doses, you just need to strike the balance between accepting that the site you created has gone on to help thousands of people, and not being arrogant. You've probably effected the "gay movement", if such a thing exists, globally, by providing a site which has helped so many come out and accept who they are with dignity. The site is an inspiration, and inspiration always leads to great things.
However, and with no disrespect to you of course, I feel it more important to thank those who give words of encouragement, advice, opinions and hugs to all the people that post here - despite a lot of the problems being repetitive, there are a number of people here who are always ready to share their own experiences, and tell others what they did (or what they should have done). It is these people who (collectively) help the hundreds of lost visitors that set up accounts here.
Nevertheless, your efforts have been invaluable to many, and not a lot of people can say that. You've achieved something big with your life. Be proud :)
Edit: I looked at those Thailand pictures. Who the hell is Jamey, and why has God not put him on MY porch in a towel? Fuck he's hot. Sorry for the outburst.
"Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same."
- Oscar Wilde
No worries...
This site wouldn't exist were it not for everyone who has turned it from computer code and server space into the community that it is today. I am well aware that the site is built because of that spirit and energy.
Jamey is someone I knew briefly in SanFran, and we both ended up in Thailand at the same time and spent most of 2-3 weeks together. He is a rather inspiring person, and last I heard, living in Tel Aviv to learn Hebrew.
Oasis is awesome and we're al
Oasis is awesome and we're all glad you started it.
And OMG Anthony Rapp!! *Dies* I <3 him.
~Kry
You deserve to feel proud of
You deserve to feel proud of this site, and allow oasis members to thank you for giving us a space where we can be ourselves and get answers and advice that we might not be able to in the communities we physically live in. This is a very unique forum/blog site, because it is a community, a loving one, and a pretty understanding one. Thank you.
There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. ~Anaïs Nin
Wow that's awesome! I have no
Wow that's awesome! I have not read Anthony Rapp's book but am a big fan and I'm planning to get it soon.. although thats probably not the point of the post :)