This started out as a rant that I was gonna post. The site thingy didn't
have the journal thing ready so I saved it. Here is what I had.
I have lied to myself. I do not belong here. This place of
"higher learning" only wants to make me one of them. I don't wish
to be here. I am never happy. It's just one day of torment after
another. Things I don't not wish to know. No. Things I do not wish
to be told. Told because there are no two sides to these people. I
wish to be free. I think that would make me happy. To go on a grand
adventure. Travel by my own feet. Live by my wits. If anything I would
be happy. To live an unhappy "safe" life or to be free and happy.
Now that I'm all calm I guess I can think about it and maybe get something
out of it. The thing is I had been watching Gulliver's Travels on the
Scifi channel. I've read the book. Books are always better then the
movies... Anyways. It just made me think so much. So many profound
statements. It just made me realize how much I hate being here at college.
Sure. It's give me a chance at a better job, higher salary, etcetera. The
thing is, is that I'm not really seeing how ANY of my classes apply to any
job I would ever want in the future. To start. I'm a biology major. I
figured that would help me get a animal related career. So. Why am I in
freaking art classes. Two of them. Why does this "teacher" that
"supposedly" want me to get something out of the class have me do optical,
interior perspective, etcetera pictures? Why does this "teacher" have us do
all the same thing when I doubt very much we all want to be/get the same
thing out of the class. Why aren't people asking what I want to be instead
of what my major is. Why would I need calculus when I want to photograph
animals? Why do I need this calculus at all? I see no myself getting no
usefulness out of it unless I become a calculus teacher or mathamatician,
which won't happen. Why do all majors require all the same number of
credits? Why are these extra "elective" classes needed? To make me more
well rounded and open minded? I get just as much "wellroundedness" out of
listening to classical music and the news on NPR, yet, I don't have to pay
thousands of dollars to listen. BLAH. Okay. Now for late breaking news
Thanks Rikki. This just in. Moms are the evil. I know mine is. Called me
a couple minutes ago to tell me about the job fair. Hey mom. What happened
to the greenhouse job? My dream job? Conveniently forgotten about. Psh.
I would have no problem with the job fair if she hadn't brought my hopes
up with the greenhouse thing and then called me last minute about it.
Officially learned Rachel's name. She told me. Even though I had already
overheard it. Anyways. Maybe I'll have a new friend one day. Mmm.
Oh. Sunday was funny at dinner. Or maybe it was supper. I'm forgetful.
Anyways. There was this big deal in the cafeteria about some "special"
people coming in to eat. The cafeteria people were even guarding the lower
and outer parts so only the "special" people could go down there to eat.
They got "special" food too. Stuff we've never had. It was all very funny.
This one guy who ended up sitting with me made a big deal out of it. Good
Seems like my rants are all over the place. I can't think of anything I
should want to write down to remember. Lotsa stuff happening this week
so I'm guessing there'll be more soon.