Good heavens I am quite the witling. Apparently I am unable to do the most simple of computer functions and in the process deleted my entire collection of blogs since the new Oasis of last year this time. I apologize, but I am sure that most shall be rejoicing- for, whom I ask wants to read my rubbish of old. Well that is all gone. Although I do have it all saved on in word.
This time of year is one in which I often reflect upon the past year and see what I have, could have, would have, wanted to have done. In most regards it was quite an interesting year, but let us reflect.
January to March: Still shrouded in a layer of internalized homophobia, I often stood upon my tower of megalomanic egoism reciting fabrications, facies of my mind, to a deaf uninterested crowd of vagabonds (such elitism seems not to have changed too much). Pain was the only result. Contemplated transferring.
April to May: See January to March. I finished my first year of University- with decent results.
June to August: Sick of my idiotic past of the past months I became determined to undergo some form of metamorphosis whereby the skin, like the blogs of old, would be shed in favor of some new brighter skin. I went to Italy for these months, and the change was painful and slow. Eventually, however, I came to terms and the proto-new me was born.
September: Saw a possible return to the first five months of this year, but then
November came and with it a new stage of metamorphosis. I went to a gay boy party. The notion of being gay became a stable of who I am. I resolved myself to coming out to my parents over thanksgiving break. It failed, but hope had not deserted me yet. Also I added a new layer of complexity to my gay persona, and joined a gay mentoring program where I get a Prof. who is gay and he becomes my mentor. I met with him and I think that it shall be a good experience.
December: Gay is now practically my middle name, while I am far from flaming, I have to control what I say around my conservative relatives (why is it that relatives always ally themselves with Republicans?) I did come out to my parents with little drama. God how I hate drama of that nature. But at least it is over with.
This next year brings the presidential election- I do not know yet who I am to vote for. Chances are I shall vote Libertarian. While Dean holds many values that I like, the idea of universal heath care just plan scares me. In my opinion Doctors are underpaid and overworked. Yes there are some doctors who make millions but the average salary is not reflective of the amount of time and responsibility and stress that they undergo each day. Universal health care will ruin heath care. Likewise, Bush is an obvious no no. I really don't need to go into it, but as gay marriage is now a big deal issue for me, anyone who supports the FMA gets no vote of mine!
Also next year I plan to join this new student group at school where we act as mentors to queer youth in HS. I think that it shall be a good way to help people who are going through what I am (went) through. Although it is my personal belief that you have to undergo the change yourself to fully understand anything.
Also next year I plan on going on a date. I think now I am ready.
My family is down for my grandparents 50th anniversary and nothing could be more hellish. Oh well, I go back to school in one week.