am I just missing something?

27 October, 2003 - 1:04am — Beryl

I think Im going to be ill. I mean, what in the Seven Hells? They've already broken up twice! What is going on?! I am so confused.... Did they honestly manage to fall in love or whatever in under a day, or am I reading this wrong? Added to the fact that both of the last times they went out it lasted all of a month for multiple reasons I played sympathetic ear too. I don't mind listening when things are in the rough, thats not what I'm saying, but you'd think I'd be kept informed when she's happy as well? If all these things were wrong enough with him last time for her to break up with him -twice-, why does it look as though they are going back out? Argg, Im so confused.

Sorry, I don't really expect that to be understandable or anything, I just needed to get that out.

Tags:

Beryl's journal

Comments

27 October, 2003 - 3:12am — Spirit1313

Too bad...

It was understandable and frankly I do not appreciate that. First of all, if you want to know something, call me. Don't type it up here on Oasis in hopes that I will read it. You have my number. JUST CALL ME. Second of all, its not like it really matters. Its my life. You seem fairly distant from me as of lately, why I am not so sure. What I do with my life is up to me. I love being friends with you, being something more would be great, but that never seems to work with us. It never has. As often as we have tried, we have failed. And yet our friendship has always stuck. There is a reason for that. What are you basing this on anyway? I know you didn't hear it from me, so I am assuming you heard it from someone else, or read something in my live journal. The times he and I were together, we were very close. You wouldn't know that and I don't expect you too. We talked more than you would think. Yes it wasn't perfect but nothing ever is. And if we worked out our problems thats great in my opinion. I don't expect you to understand, hell I dont even fucking understand, but damn it, I would never expect this from you. I am glad you feel something about it, whether it be concern or something else, but I really wish you had talked to me directly. This is how our breakdown in communication always happens. I cared about you A LOT Heather, at one point I had fallen so far for you, there seemed no way I would recover, but then everything fell apart and I was hurt. I don't want that to happen again. I don't want to lose you as a friend, we have shared to much together. Please understand where I am coming from...
~Lisa Faery~

27 October, 2003 - 3:16am — Spirit1313

Side Note

I would have told you except I was at my dad's Saturday and today my mom and Lynn had stuff to do and they brought me with them, plus I fucked up my knee on friday making the float and I had to go and see someone about that.
~Lisa Faery~

30 October, 2003 - 4:59pm — Beryl

meh

First and formost, whats wrong with your knee? Is it alright?

Alright, Im going to just read what you said and address it in that order, not by importance.
I posted about this on oasis because oasis is my blog, and I needed to get out my confusion and feelings on the matter at least a bit or I wouldn't be able to settle down. I wasn't searching for your reaction, and I purposely didn't mention any names and was vague so it wouldn't reflect onto you, because I know people's opinions matter to you. We both have as equal a right to write here as each other or anyone else. Im sorry I didn't call, but it honestly didn't occur to me. I intended to ask you what had happened at school, the same as last time. I respect your right to live your life as you wish, and Im happy that you seem so happy with him. But that doesn't change that what you do can effect me. Im sorry if I seemed distant lately, I haven't meant to be, but I do still care and I was worried by some comments you made and confused by the speed of everything. I read about this in your livejournal, which you gave me the address to a while back. I wasn't trying to attack you or anything, which is what it sounds like you think. If you are happy, I am happy for you. I like to think we are good friends, and I don't want to hurt that. But please try to understand where I was coming from as well. As far as I knew he was not exactly in your favor and then I read you two were going out again. I'm sorry this took so long to respond too, but I took some time to think about it so I would be reasonable and my computer access has been limited because I'm grounded from the computer and phone again.
~Beryl