According to the SelectSmart.com Belief System Selector, my #1 belief match is Neo-Pagan. What do you believe? Visit SelectSmart.com/RELIGION
I would have never considered myself to be pagan, but acording to this, my beliefs lean towards paganism.
ACCORDING TO THAT WEBSITE, I AM A SOCIOPATHIC SATAN WORSHIPPER. I SACRIFICE SMALL ANIMALS TO MR. SATAN. I STEAL THINGS. I GO TO SAFEWAY AND COMMIT ACTS THAT HORRIFY AND DISGUST OLD LADIES, PROMPTING THEM TO BEAT ME WITH SPAGHETTI NOODLES. SPEAKING OF SAFEWAY, I MUST NOW GO THERE AND FILL MY HALDOL PRESCRIPTION. PRAY TO THE MASTER THAT I WILL NOT BE BEATEN TO DEATH WITH SPAGHETTI NOODLES. SAYONARA, AU REVOIR, AND LONG LIVE MARLENE DIETRICH.
Sorry about that. Actually, my "ideal" religion is Mahayana Buddhism. Whatever... Those online quizzes that are meant to be funny are kind of entertaining, but ones that are serious are kind of creepy, like they're one of those proto-apocalyptic things or something, indicative of a slow but noticeable cultural decay, y'know?
Attention shoppers: the end is nigh and soon we will all perish in flames, so buy our 2-liter bottles of Pepsi for $0.99 while they're still available.
According to the SelectSmart.com Belief System Selector, my #1 belief match is Mahayana Buddhism. What do you believe? Visit SelectSmart.com/RELIGION
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