Tonight was the open house at the doctoral program that wants me (so far, that is; I'm waiting on word from five schools).
The basic summary is: great program, very humane, high job placement rate and ... no money. They will matriculate 25-30 (it's a large program) and one of those will get a four year fellowship. In contrast, everyone who matriculates at Columbia gets at least a five year fellowship, sometimes six. Most doctoral programs offer funding similar to Columbia's, even if they are offered by public institutions.
If I went, I would be teaching undergrad in the fall. Composition. Me, probably my own syllabus, my own students. I'd be teaching specialized classes in my area of interest soon after that. Scary, huh? It sure frightens me!
They want me. They were very clear about that. Everyone I saw from the admissions committee remembered my application well. One of them even remembered my paper topic. (Eeek.)
And Eve Sedgwick (Epistemology of the Closet, a book that I found impressive but not always comprehensible) was there, surprisingly. I didn't think their big name folk would come out for recruitment. She gave a talk about how much she was looking forward to mentoring the incoming class. I know there's a lot of bullshit in the academic world, but that woman has presence. She seemed very sincere. My bullshit radar didn't go off.
I could see what I would be like there. This was very helpful. I have something a little more tangible with me now. And I like the Linds that would develop there. She would be a pretty grounded, concrete character, and an able (queer/feminist) scholar.
It's nice to be able to place myself in a potential future.
I got another summer job. Web stuff. Go me!