I was discussing this with a friend in the middle of "Magic and Witchcraft in the Greco-Roman World" today... I think there should be a student discount for vibrators and other sex toys. I'm too cheap otherwise, and those things are frigging expensive! To keep students productive and happy, they must be sexually satisfied, and vibrators (or buttplugs, or whatever gets you off) should be handed out at orientations, or at least an order form. If my entire university was sexually satisfied, there'd be a lot less random hooking up, which leads to disease and stuff. So for health and academic reasons, universities should subsidize vibrators.

Note: as cool as the implementation of this suggestion would be, I am not serious right now. It's 2:18 am, people, I'm never serious at this hour. Bedtime...